My Child Seems Upset After Being Online
If your child seems withdrawn, anxious, or upset after using their phone or going online, here's what you can do.
What to do right now
Stay calm
Your child needs to see that you can handle whatever they share. Take a breath before reacting.
Be present, not pushy
Sit near them. Let them know you're there. Say: "I've noticed you seem a bit upset. I'm here whenever you're ready to talk."
Don't take the phone away immediately
Removing the device can feel like punishment. Focus on connection first, boundaries later.
Listen without fixing
If they do open up, resist the urge to solve it straight away. "That sounds really hard" goes further than "Just ignore them."
Signs to watch for
Mood changes after phone use
Withdrawing from family or friends
Checking phone obsessively
Reluctance to show you their screen
Sleep disruption or staying up late
Sudden changes in friendship groups
Unexplained anger or tearfulness
Avoiding school or social events
Phrases that help
"I noticed you seemed a bit down after being on your phone. Want to talk about it?"
"You don't have to tell me everything, but I'm here if you need me."
"Has something happened online that's bothering you?"
"I won't be angry. I just want to understand."
"Sometimes things online can feel really intense. That's normal."
When to seek professional help
If any of the following apply, consider speaking to your GP or contacting a support service:
- •Your child talks about self-harm or not wanting to be here
- •Behaviour changes have persisted for more than two weeks
- •They are refusing to attend school
- •You suspect cyberbullying, grooming, or exploitation